Showing posts with label Amusements. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Amusements. Show all posts
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Vote for us!
Come on, vote for Bryan and I! We could win a fun little prize package. Besides, it's a snow day - I had to find a way to entertain us!
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Monday, May 19, 2008
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Rules for playing music in an ensemble
1. Everyone should play the same piece.
2. Observe the repeat signs only if what you just played was interesting.
3. If you play a wrong note, glare at one of the other players.
4. Carefully tune your instrument before playing. Then, if you play out of tune, you can at least do it with a clear conscience.
5. The right note, at the wrong time, is a wrong note. (And vice- versa.)
6. A wrong note, played timidly, is a wrong note.
7. A wrong note, played with authority, is simply your interpretation of the phrase.
8. If everyone gets lost except you, follow the ones who are lost.
9. Strive always to play the maximum notes per second. This will intimidate the weaker players and gain you the admiration of the ignorant.
10. Markings for slurs, dynamics, and accidentals should be completely ignored. They are only there to make the score look more complicated.
11. If a passage is difficult, slow down. If it is easy, speed up. Everything will even itself out in the end.
12. You have achieved a true interpretation when, in the end, you have not played one note of the original piece.
13. When everyone else stops playing, you should stop also. Do not play any notes you may have left over.
14. Blessed are those without perfect pitch, for the kingdom of music is theirs.
2. Observe the repeat signs only if what you just played was interesting.
3. If you play a wrong note, glare at one of the other players.
4. Carefully tune your instrument before playing. Then, if you play out of tune, you can at least do it with a clear conscience.
5. The right note, at the wrong time, is a wrong note. (And vice- versa.)
6. A wrong note, played timidly, is a wrong note.
7. A wrong note, played with authority, is simply your interpretation of the phrase.
8. If everyone gets lost except you, follow the ones who are lost.
9. Strive always to play the maximum notes per second. This will intimidate the weaker players and gain you the admiration of the ignorant.
10. Markings for slurs, dynamics, and accidentals should be completely ignored. They are only there to make the score look more complicated.
11. If a passage is difficult, slow down. If it is easy, speed up. Everything will even itself out in the end.
12. You have achieved a true interpretation when, in the end, you have not played one note of the original piece.
13. When everyone else stops playing, you should stop also. Do not play any notes you may have left over.
14. Blessed are those without perfect pitch, for the kingdom of music is theirs.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Average Toys for the Average Child
This site claims to have average toys for the average child because not every child can not grow up to be Einstein.Check out Baby Bush Toys.
(This particular toy is Lil' Looming Disaster Pillow - still has me chuckling)
Monday, February 11, 2008
Ah, the Theatre!
Yes, I have probably spent too much time in the theater and that probably contributes to why I can relate to so many of these statements. And yes, actor can be replaced with musician. Here goes:
Ah, the theatre:
-Your weekend consists of Monday, and only Monday.
-"Q" is not just a letter.
-National holidays that fall on Monday seem pointless to you.
-You can only read from a light that is blue.
-You can't remember what daylight looks like.
-You feel naked without a belt with your Maglite, Leatherman, and Gerber.
-You know tie-line has several uses---shoelaces, belts, ponytail holders...
-95% of your wardrobe is black.
-You watch the Super Bowl, waiting for intermission, not half-time.
-You tell more stories of what went wrong on shows you've done than what went smoothly.
-You start wondering what it feels like to be a prop.
-Your diet consists of …… um, when did I eat last?
-Your Halloween costume in some way utilizes running blacks and gaff tape.
-You insist on spelling "theatre" with an "re" not an "er".
-At home, you "strike" your dishes to the kitchen.
-When asked to fix something you hurry and get the Gaff tape.
-You have a favorite place to take naps between shows.
-You never see true daylight more than twice a week.
-When you leave the theater you say you are going out, and when you get back you say your home.
-You haven't had a true DATE for a long time.
-The gaffer tape residue on your hands has become a second skin.
-In the back pocket of all your black jeans, there is a faded area resembling a wrench.
-Red Bull, Cherry Coke, Jolt Cola, Coffee, and Dr. Pepper are your new best friends.
-Items on your birthday/holiday lists: Tools. And for your fantasy wish list: Sleep-in-a-Can, and InstaRespect(Simply sprinkle liberally on actors and they will suddenly feel indebted to you forever.)
-You find yourself waiting at the bus stop, in the summer, when it's 100°in the shade, wearing black pants, a black "Production Crew" t-shirt, black boots / shoes, a black back pack, and black sunglasses.
-You've read the Techie Gospel so many times, you start to question why God didn't use Techies.
-You give and/or recieve MagLites for all special occasions.
-You eat, sleep, and breathe tech.
-You own promotional items from tech companies.
-You keep a list of creative ways to impale actors.
-You paint your room black.
-Someone asks you the time and you reply with "14 minutes 'till places,please."
-You build, furnish, and tear down at least 3 houses every 36 weeks.
-You wear black for no reason.
-You rearrange your room in the dark.
-You wake up and wonder if you have missed your cue.
-You close all doors softly.
-You remember events by which show it happened during.
-You curse at inanimate objects.
-You tell someone you're headed home, when you're actually going to the theatre.
-You know the lines of the play better than the actors.
-The phrase 'head set sing-along' brings back fond memories.
-You drag your friends into being a tech too.
-You sometimes start talking, thinking you have a headset on.
-You can never sit through a whole play without feeling you need to do something.
-If you're missing, friends know where to find you - in the theater
Ah, the theatre:
-Your weekend consists of Monday, and only Monday.
-"Q" is not just a letter.
-National holidays that fall on Monday seem pointless to you.
-You can only read from a light that is blue.
-You can't remember what daylight looks like.
-You feel naked without a belt with your Maglite, Leatherman, and Gerber.
-You know tie-line has several uses---shoelaces, belts, ponytail holders...
-95% of your wardrobe is black.
-You watch the Super Bowl, waiting for intermission, not half-time.
-You tell more stories of what went wrong on shows you've done than what went smoothly.
-You start wondering what it feels like to be a prop.
-Your diet consists of …… um, when did I eat last?
-Your Halloween costume in some way utilizes running blacks and gaff tape.
-You insist on spelling "theatre" with an "re" not an "er".
-At home, you "strike" your dishes to the kitchen.
-When asked to fix something you hurry and get the Gaff tape.
-You have a favorite place to take naps between shows.
-You never see true daylight more than twice a week.
-When you leave the theater you say you are going out, and when you get back you say your home.
-You haven't had a true DATE for a long time.
-The gaffer tape residue on your hands has become a second skin.
-In the back pocket of all your black jeans, there is a faded area resembling a wrench.
-Red Bull, Cherry Coke, Jolt Cola, Coffee, and Dr. Pepper are your new best friends.
-Items on your birthday/holiday lists: Tools. And for your fantasy wish list: Sleep-in-a-Can, and InstaRespect(Simply sprinkle liberally on actors and they will suddenly feel indebted to you forever.)
-You find yourself waiting at the bus stop, in the summer, when it's 100°in the shade, wearing black pants, a black "Production Crew" t-shirt, black boots / shoes, a black back pack, and black sunglasses.
-You've read the Techie Gospel so many times, you start to question why God didn't use Techies.
-You give and/or recieve MagLites for all special occasions.
-You eat, sleep, and breathe tech.
-You own promotional items from tech companies.
-You keep a list of creative ways to impale actors.
-You paint your room black.
-Someone asks you the time and you reply with "14 minutes 'till places,please."
-You build, furnish, and tear down at least 3 houses every 36 weeks.
-You wear black for no reason.
-You rearrange your room in the dark.
-You wake up and wonder if you have missed your cue.
-You close all doors softly.
-You remember events by which show it happened during.
-You curse at inanimate objects.
-You tell someone you're headed home, when you're actually going to the theatre.
-You know the lines of the play better than the actors.
-The phrase 'head set sing-along' brings back fond memories.
-You drag your friends into being a tech too.
-You sometimes start talking, thinking you have a headset on.
-You can never sit through a whole play without feeling you need to do something.
-If you're missing, friends know where to find you - in the theater
After a concert
After a concert week (especially one that went as smoothly as this one did) it's nice to enjoy a music related chuckle or two. A special thanks to Nick and Orin for sending these my way.
Actual Instructions from Professional Conductors to the Orchestra While In Rehearsal)
"Please don't use the depth-charge pizzicato."
"Pianissimo doesn't mean 'Drop the fuck out.'"
"Listen to the tune, and then accompany it in a non-disgraceful fashion."
"Let's see if you can pizzicato together in a non-banjo-like way."
"It's very hard to raise money for something that sounds like this."
"You know, there's a fine line between artistry and shit; not that what you're doing is shit, but it's close to it."
"Imagine you're getting enough money for what you do."
"Not so bright. It sounds like 'Orpheus in His Underwear'"
"Play short, especially if you don't know where you are."
"That was a drive-by viola solo."
"Horns, imagine that you've had a really ugly breakfast and it's about to come up."
"There is a lot of fishing for notes. I wish you would catch them."
"Play faster. It's getting late."
"Strings, I know what you're thinking: 'With all this racket going on, why am I playing? Well, there's no time for existential questions right now."
"This must be much more agitated. Think of someone you hate. Think of your mother-in- law."
"The place where you will be shot if you come in early is the bar before 26."
"Now forget all the nasty things I said and play naturally."
"You're all wondering what speed it's going to go. Well, so am I."
"Play as if you were musicians."
QUOTES
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: "I write [music] as a sow pisses."
Cole Porter: My sole inspiration is a telephone call from a producer."
Gustav Mahler to Bruno Walter who had stopped to admire mountain scenery in rural Austria: Don't bother to look, I've composed all this already."
Xavier Cugat: "I would rather play Chiquita Banana and have my swimming pool than play Bach and starve."
Jean Sibelius explaining why he rarely invited musicians to his home: "[Musicians] talk of nothing but money and jobs. Give me businessmen every time. They really are interested in music and art."
Ludwig van Beethoven: "The amount of money one needs is terrifying..."
Kirke Mecham on his life as a composer: "Only become a musician if there is absolutely no other way you can make a living."
Bob Dylan: "Chaos is a friend of mine."
Camille Saint-Saens: "There is nothing more difficult than talking about music."
Nicolo Paganini: "I am not handsome, but when women hear me play, they come crawling to my feet."
Ringo Starr: "Of course I'm ambitious. What's wrong with that? Otherwise you sleep all day."
Nathaniel Hawthorne: "What is the voice of song, when the world lacks the ear of taste?"
Victor Borge, playing to a half-filled house in Flint, Michigan:."Flint must be an extremely wealthy town: I see that each of you bought two or three seats."
Oscar Wilde: If one hears bad music it is one's duty to drown it by one's conversation."
Mel Brooks: "Critics can't even make music by rubbing their back legs together."
William F. Buckley, Jr.: "Life can't be all bad when for ten dollars you can buy all the Beethoven sonatas and listen to them for ten years."
Oscar Levant, explaining his way out of a speeding ticket: "You can't possibly hear the last movement of Beethoven's Seventh and go slow.".
Mark Twain: "Wagner's music is better than it sounds."
Ringo Starr: "I love Beethoven, especially the poems."
James Gibbons Hunekar: "Berlioz says nothing in his music, but he says it magnificently."
Walter Damrosch on Aaron Copland: "If a young man at the age of twenty-three can write a symphony like that, in five years he will be ready to commit murder."
Sergei Prokofiev: "There are still so many beautiful things to be said in C major."
Dimitri Mitropolous: "I never use a score when conducting my orchestra. Does a lion tamer enter a cage with a book on how to tame a lion?"
Arturo Toscanini to a trumpet player: "God tells me how the music should sound, but you stand in the way."
Bruno Walter at his first rehearsal with an American orchestra, on seeing the players reaching for their instruments: "Already too loud!"
Frederic Chopin: "I really don't know whether any place contains more pianists than Paris, or whether you can find more asses and virtuosos anywhere."
Bob Hope, on comedienne Phyllis Diller: "When she started to play, Steinway himself came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano."
Richard Strauss: "Never look at the trombones, it only encourages them."
Claude Debussy: "In opera, there is always too much singing."
Samuel Johnson's definition of opera: "An exotic and irrational entertainment."
Pierre Beaumarchais about The Barber of Seville: "If a thing isn't worth saying, you sing it."
Robert Benchley: "Opera is where a guy gets stabbed in the back and instead of dying, he sings."
Ford Frick: "I'd hate for this to get out, but I really like opera."
Gioachino Rossini: "Oh how wonderful really wonderful opera would be if there were no singers!"
Sir Thomas Beecham: "Movie music is noise. It's even more painful than my sciatica."
Bing Crosby: "I think popular music in this country is one of the few things in the twentieth century that have made giant strides in reverse."
Glenn Gould, speaking of the Beatles: "Theirs is a happy, cocky, belligerently resourceless brand of harmonic primitivism. In the Liverpudlian repertoire, the indulgent amateurishness of the musical material, though closely rivaled by the indifference of the performing style, is actually surpassed only by the ineptitude of the studio production method. . . Strawberry Fields suggests a chance encounter at a mountain wedding between Claudio Monteverdi and a jug band."
Jerry Garcia: "It's pretty clear now that what looked like it might have been some kind of counterculture is, in reality, just the plain old chaos of undifferentiated weirdness."
Frank Zappa on his rock symphony debuted by the Los Angeles Philharmonic: "A ponderous orchestral absurdity."
Actual Instructions from Professional Conductors to the Orchestra While In Rehearsal)
"Please don't use the depth-charge pizzicato."
"Pianissimo doesn't mean 'Drop the fuck out.'"
"Listen to the tune, and then accompany it in a non-disgraceful fashion."
"Let's see if you can pizzicato together in a non-banjo-like way."
"It's very hard to raise money for something that sounds like this."
"You know, there's a fine line between artistry and shit; not that what you're doing is shit, but it's close to it."
"Imagine you're getting enough money for what you do."
"Not so bright. It sounds like 'Orpheus in His Underwear'"
"Play short, especially if you don't know where you are."
"That was a drive-by viola solo."
"Horns, imagine that you've had a really ugly breakfast and it's about to come up."
"There is a lot of fishing for notes. I wish you would catch them."
"Play faster. It's getting late."
"Strings, I know what you're thinking: 'With all this racket going on, why am I playing? Well, there's no time for existential questions right now."
"This must be much more agitated. Think of someone you hate. Think of your mother-in- law."
"The place where you will be shot if you come in early is the bar before 26."
"Now forget all the nasty things I said and play naturally."
"You're all wondering what speed it's going to go. Well, so am I."
"Play as if you were musicians."
QUOTES
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: "I write [music] as a sow pisses."
Cole Porter: My sole inspiration is a telephone call from a producer."
Gustav Mahler to Bruno Walter who had stopped to admire mountain scenery in rural Austria: Don't bother to look, I've composed all this already."
Xavier Cugat: "I would rather play Chiquita Banana and have my swimming pool than play Bach and starve."
Jean Sibelius explaining why he rarely invited musicians to his home: "[Musicians] talk of nothing but money and jobs. Give me businessmen every time. They really are interested in music and art."
Ludwig van Beethoven: "The amount of money one needs is terrifying..."
Kirke Mecham on his life as a composer: "Only become a musician if there is absolutely no other way you can make a living."
Bob Dylan: "Chaos is a friend of mine."
Camille Saint-Saens: "There is nothing more difficult than talking about music."
Nicolo Paganini: "I am not handsome, but when women hear me play, they come crawling to my feet."
Ringo Starr: "Of course I'm ambitious. What's wrong with that? Otherwise you sleep all day."
Nathaniel Hawthorne: "What is the voice of song, when the world lacks the ear of taste?"
Victor Borge, playing to a half-filled house in Flint, Michigan:."Flint must be an extremely wealthy town: I see that each of you bought two or three seats."
Oscar Wilde: If one hears bad music it is one's duty to drown it by one's conversation."
Mel Brooks: "Critics can't even make music by rubbing their back legs together."
William F. Buckley, Jr.: "Life can't be all bad when for ten dollars you can buy all the Beethoven sonatas and listen to them for ten years."
Oscar Levant, explaining his way out of a speeding ticket: "You can't possibly hear the last movement of Beethoven's Seventh and go slow.".
Mark Twain: "Wagner's music is better than it sounds."
Ringo Starr: "I love Beethoven, especially the poems."
James Gibbons Hunekar: "Berlioz says nothing in his music, but he says it magnificently."
Walter Damrosch on Aaron Copland: "If a young man at the age of twenty-three can write a symphony like that, in five years he will be ready to commit murder."
Sergei Prokofiev: "There are still so many beautiful things to be said in C major."
Dimitri Mitropolous: "I never use a score when conducting my orchestra. Does a lion tamer enter a cage with a book on how to tame a lion?"
Arturo Toscanini to a trumpet player: "God tells me how the music should sound, but you stand in the way."
Bruno Walter at his first rehearsal with an American orchestra, on seeing the players reaching for their instruments: "Already too loud!"
Frederic Chopin: "I really don't know whether any place contains more pianists than Paris, or whether you can find more asses and virtuosos anywhere."
Bob Hope, on comedienne Phyllis Diller: "When she started to play, Steinway himself came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano."
Richard Strauss: "Never look at the trombones, it only encourages them."
Claude Debussy: "In opera, there is always too much singing."
Samuel Johnson's definition of opera: "An exotic and irrational entertainment."
Pierre Beaumarchais about The Barber of Seville: "If a thing isn't worth saying, you sing it."
Robert Benchley: "Opera is where a guy gets stabbed in the back and instead of dying, he sings."
Ford Frick: "I'd hate for this to get out, but I really like opera."
Gioachino Rossini: "Oh how wonderful really wonderful opera would be if there were no singers!"
Sir Thomas Beecham: "Movie music is noise. It's even more painful than my sciatica."
Bing Crosby: "I think popular music in this country is one of the few things in the twentieth century that have made giant strides in reverse."
Glenn Gould, speaking of the Beatles: "Theirs is a happy, cocky, belligerently resourceless brand of harmonic primitivism. In the Liverpudlian repertoire, the indulgent amateurishness of the musical material, though closely rivaled by the indifference of the performing style, is actually surpassed only by the ineptitude of the studio production method. . . Strawberry Fields suggests a chance encounter at a mountain wedding between Claudio Monteverdi and a jug band."
Jerry Garcia: "It's pretty clear now that what looked like it might have been some kind of counterculture is, in reality, just the plain old chaos of undifferentiated weirdness."
Frank Zappa on his rock symphony debuted by the Los Angeles Philharmonic: "A ponderous orchestral absurdity."
Sunday, October 21, 2007
A list of actual places to travel in Texas...
Need to be cheered up?
Happy, Texas 79042
Pep , Texas 79353
Smiley , Texas 78159
Paradise , Texas 76073
Rainbow , Texas 76077
Sweet Home , Texas 77987
Comfort , Texas 78013
Friendship, Texas 76530
***
Love the Sun?
Sun City , Texas 78628
Sunrise , Texas 76661
Sunset, Texas 76270
Sundown, Texas 79372
Sunray , Texas 79086
Sunny Side , Texas 77423
***
Want something to eat?
Bacon , Texas 76301
Noodle , Texas 79536
Oatmeal , Texas 78605
Turkey y , Texas 79261
Trout , Texas 75789
Sugar Land , Texas 77479
Salty, Texas 76567
Pearland, Texas 77581
Rice , Texas 75155
And top it off with:
Sweetwater , Texas 79556
***
Why travel to other cities? Texas has them ALL!
Detroit , Texas 75436
Colorado City , Texas 79512
Denver City , Texas 79323
Nevada , Texas 75173
Memphis , Texas 79245
Miami , Texas 79059
Boston , Texas 75570
Santa Fe , Texas 77517
Tennessee Colony , Texas 75861
Reno , Texas 75462
***
Feel like traveling outside the country?
Don't bother buying a plane ticket!
Athens , Texas 75751
Canadian , Texas 79014
China , Texas 77613
Egypt , Texas 77436
Turkey , Texas 79261
London , Texas 76854
New London , Texas 75682
Paris , Texas 75460
***
No need to travel to Washington D.C.
Whitehouse , Texas 75791
***
We even have a city named after our planet!
Earth , Texas 79031
***
And a city named after our State!
Texas City , Texas 77590
***
Exhausted?
Energy , Texas 76452
***
Cold?
Blanket , Texas 76432
Winters, Texas
***
Hot?
Poolville , Texas 76487
Cool, Texas ( Parker County )
***
Like to read about History?
Santa Anna , Texas
Goliad, Texas
Alamo, Texas
Gun Barrel City , Texas
***
Need Office Supplies?
Staples , Texas 78670
***
Men are from Mars, woman are from
Venus , Texas 76084
***
You guessed it.. it's on the state line..
Texline , Texas 79087
***
For the kids...
Kermit , Texas 79745
Elmo , Texas 75118
Nemo , Texas 76070
Tarzan , Texas 79783
Winnie , Texas 77665
Sylvester , Texas 79560
***
Other city names in Texas , to make you smile..... : :))
Frognot , Texas 75424
Bigfoot , Texas 78005
Hogeye , Texas 75423
Cactus , Texas 79013
Notrees , Texas 79759
Best, Texas 76932
Veribest , Texas 76886
Kickapoo , Texas 75763
Dime Box, Texas
Telephone , Texas 75488
Telegraph , Texas 76883
West, Texas 76691
Whiteface , Texas 79379
Twitty, Texas 79079
***
And last but not least.. The Anti-Al Gore City
Kilgore , Texas 75662
***
< B>Have a Good Day!
***
P.S. Whoops, left out :
Muleshoe
Cut n shoot,
Hoop And Holler,
Ding Dong, and don't forget.......
Farewell , Texas
***
And, of course, there is a place in Texas that is......
KNOTT , TEXAS
***
Well, whata you know????
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Double entendre
I have the unique skill of incorporating double entendres into my everyday speech unintentionally. For some reason before escaping from my mouth I have only contemplated the naive nature of these combinations of words and phrases. As soon as they escape my lips and travel the short distance to the listener's ear, well, then there is no going back.
Frequently these lapses in speech evaluation evolve into running jokes. The D.E. of the month is no different.
Here goes:
While preparing for an event recently, I discussed with several colleagues the possibility of lowering a portion of the stage to create a dais. The conversation focused on the appropriate height differential between the dais and the main stage. Realizing that the speaker who would need to cross between the dais and the stage was a shorter gentleman I wanted to make sure that the distance was an appropriate one for him. Further, conversation participants tossed around the idea that the speaker (short man) could talk to the person on the stage without taking the step up.
And then I said....
"But we must remember that eight inches is tall on a short man."
And the rest my dear friends, is the stuff that comprise inside jokes.
Frequently these lapses in speech evaluation evolve into running jokes. The D.E. of the month is no different.
Here goes:
While preparing for an event recently, I discussed with several colleagues the possibility of lowering a portion of the stage to create a dais. The conversation focused on the appropriate height differential between the dais and the main stage. Realizing that the speaker who would need to cross between the dais and the stage was a shorter gentleman I wanted to make sure that the distance was an appropriate one for him. Further, conversation participants tossed around the idea that the speaker (short man) could talk to the person on the stage without taking the step up.
And then I said....
"But we must remember that eight inches is tall on a short man."
And the rest my dear friends, is the stuff that comprise inside jokes.
Monday, January 29, 2007
Deep thought for a Monday
Some people are like slinkies. They don't really have a purpose, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Sunday, October 22, 2006
Leonardo's adventure
This is posted for those folks who did not believe in this incarnation of Leonardo.Yes, it really happenened.
Monday, October 09, 2006
Happy Columbus Day
Pay special attention to the dark cloud of influenza that accompanies Senor Columbus on his journey to the Americas.
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Talk Like A Pirate Day
Yo, Ho, Yo, Ho,
It's "Talk Like A Pirate" Day!
That time in September when sea dogs remember
That grown-ups still know how ta play!
When wenches are curvy and dogs are all scurvy
And a soft-wear patch covers your eye,
Ta hell with our jobs, for one day we're all swabs
And buccaneers all till we die!
Lyrics from Tom Smith's TLAPD Anthem
Arrr, it be true mates. Tuesday, September 19th is International Talk Like a Pirate Day!
To be honest it didn't start as an international phenomenon as the originators of the holiday, John Baur and Mark Summers, will tell you. One day Dave Barry caught word of the concept and the rest is pirate legend.
Want to talk like a pirate? Try working these phrases into your vocabulary on Tuesday:
Ahoy! instead of Hello!
Avast! instead of Whoa! Get a load of that! OR No way!
Aye! instead of Why yes, I agree most heartily with everything you just said or did.
Aye aye! instead of I'll get right on that sir
Arrr should be used at any opportune moment
More pirate talk recommendations can be found here.
Still struggling with adopting the pirate lingo? Try this hi-tech option:
When conversing with a chum in Windows Live Messenger choose the following options:
To be honest it didn't start as an international phenomenon as the originators of the holiday, John Baur and Mark Summers, will tell you. One day Dave Barry caught word of the concept and the rest is pirate legend.
Want to talk like a pirate? Try working these phrases into your vocabulary on Tuesday:
Ahoy! instead of Hello!
Avast! instead of Whoa! Get a load of that! OR No way!
Aye! instead of Why yes, I agree most heartily with everything you just said or did.
Aye aye! instead of I'll get right on that sir
Arrr should be used at any opportune moment
More pirate talk recommendations can be found here.
Still struggling with adopting the pirate lingo? Try this hi-tech option:
When conversing with a chum in Windows Live Messenger choose the following options:
- See a list of games
- Select MSN Mimic
- Choose Pirate
- Enter your words in the text box and mimic will translate for you. ARrr, a hassle free way to speak of the pirate way. (Although, not a very pirate thing to do)
As fer de photo at the top of this page, let me just say that me pirate mates and I took that photo long before bein' pirates was cool. ARRRRR!!!
Friday, August 25, 2006
Honest Mechanic?
No, it's not an oxymoron, this week I actually met and worked with an honest mechanic. Call in the producers of Dateline for this special!
The short story...my car had been in and out of the shop for the past two weeks. The visit was triggered by a pesky check engine light. In this case the light was on for a reason...one that no matter the proposed solution did not seem to rectify the bigger issue. After days of repairs and hundreds of dollars invested the mechanic called me to say that he was stumped and could not fix my car. He recommended that I pick the car up at the end of the day. I went to the shop at the end of the day to pick up my drivable yet ill vehicle. Jimmy recommended that I contact a Chrysler dealer to work on the beast because he was stumped...he left all of the new parts in the car, asked me to call him when the dealer found a remedy because he would like to know how to fix it and handed me a check totaling the amount that I had spent on the car in the past two weeks. Can you believe it?
My friend Eric says I live a charmed life and must be part Irish because he had never heard of a mechanic willing to issue a refund for that much labor. Good thing I do and I am.
The short story...my car had been in and out of the shop for the past two weeks. The visit was triggered by a pesky check engine light. In this case the light was on for a reason...one that no matter the proposed solution did not seem to rectify the bigger issue. After days of repairs and hundreds of dollars invested the mechanic called me to say that he was stumped and could not fix my car. He recommended that I pick the car up at the end of the day. I went to the shop at the end of the day to pick up my drivable yet ill vehicle. Jimmy recommended that I contact a Chrysler dealer to work on the beast because he was stumped...he left all of the new parts in the car, asked me to call him when the dealer found a remedy because he would like to know how to fix it and handed me a check totaling the amount that I had spent on the car in the past two weeks. Can you believe it?
My friend Eric says I live a charmed life and must be part Irish because he had never heard of a mechanic willing to issue a refund for that much labor. Good thing I do and I am.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Another West Texas Moment...
I would not have believed it unless I saw it with my own two eyes. This afternoon, returning from a lunch meeting, I saw six horses "parked" (and I use the term loosely) in a Dairy Queen parking lot. (I-40 and Washington - not exactly a rural setting). No, there is not a hitching post at this particular establishment. Yet, there the horses stood, each in their own parking stall while their owners were presumably dining at the Dairy Queen. My traveling companion indicated that the horses were hobbled together. Now all we need is some tumbleweed on Polk Street, and a shoot-out at the saloon and the experience would be complete.
Thursday, March 30, 2006
The ultimate in April fool's day pranks
The work has been done. This weekend I enter a whole new level of pranksterdom with what I deem to be my best April Fool's joke to date. Our joke team established the foundation with a key victim this afternoon. The victim took the bait - hook, line and sinker. It should be fun to watch this unfold over the next few days.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)